


Chest Pains

by pugra



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Emotionally Repressed Logan, Happy Ending, Logan's gotta deal with some emotions, M/M, and Patton knows a little something about dealing with repressed emotions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:41:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24550990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pugra/pseuds/pugra
Summary: Logan clutches his chest in pain. Strange. Surely it had nothing to do with his thoughts wandering to Roman and his sparkly eyes and his warm smile and his-
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders
Comments: 7
Kudos: 51





	Chest Pains

**Author's Note:**

> This is me very much projecting onto Logan, but I feel like it works for his character. Took some of the lovely constructive criticism from the first draft and as of 6/6/2020 this is the edited version with an ending I'm slightly more satisfied with. Hope you enjoy!

Logan clutched his chest in pain.

Strange. The sides _could_ feel pain of course, that wasn't the strange thing. It was that he knew heart problems were not something that could affect the sides and nothing had physically touched his chest.

His knowledge didn't stop the pain, however. It was dull and steady and making it hard to breathe. Luckily, he was in the safety of his room, going over the most recent script that Roman had written. Nobody was around to witness his sudden physical weakness.

The real problem was Logan didn't know _why_ his chest was hurting. He had been sitting here, looking over the script. He had just read a joke Logan suspected would land particularly well with Thomas's audience and had thought he should remember to compliment Roman on a job well done...

Roman. He'd been thinking of Roman when the pain hit. He'd been thinking about how Roman would likely grin when complimented, pleased his work had been appreciated. His eyes would sparkle and-

Logan winced as the pain increased and he crumpled further in on himself, his hand clenching even tighter.

...ah. This could prove to be a problem.

"Logan?"

Logan jerked his hand away from his chest and sat up straight, a desperate attempt to hide his state of discomposure as he vaguely shuffled the papers on his desk and looked up in surprise.

“Hm? Oh.”

Roman. Of course. He was here to see how far Logan was with editing. The pain pulsed but Logan only tensed for a moment, refusing to flinch.

Roman’s face was a mask of concern. He stood, hovering the doorway, seeming unsure if he should come in or not.

“Logan, are you…alright? You looked, well, not great a second ago.”

Logan sighed and gestured for Roman to come in and Roman took a hesitant step into the room.

“I apologize for my…state at the moment. I think perhaps I have been overworking myself.”

Roman chuckled nervously. “I suppose that my question of how the editing was going might be unwelcome at the moment, then?”

Logan waved Roman’s concern away. “No, your company is not unwelcome. The editing was going well. In fact,” Logan allowed a small smile to slip through despite his pain. “I think this script may be your best yet, Roman.”

Roman’s smile, beautiful and genuine and _warm_ , was worth the stabbing pain that forced Logan to double over, hand returning to his chest. Logan felt Roman grab his shoulders, could feel the panic in the strength of his grip. He heard Roman calling his name, but Roman touching him seemed to be too much as the pain increased and consciousness left him.

When he began to regain his senses, the first thing he felt was a warm hand in his. He slowly opened his eyes to find himself lying in his bed and Roman sitting at his side. The creative side was asleep, gently snoring, and gripping Logan’s hand tightly.

The pain pulsed in his chest but it was a little more bearable. His attention moved from Roman’s gentle expression as his door was softly opened. Patton peaked in and the relief on his face made Logan feel guilty for making the others worry. Not that he could’ve helped it, but still.

Patton sat down at Logan’s side opposite from Roman, obviously making an effort not to wake him. “Glad to see with your eyes open, Lo.”

Logan reached for the glasses at his bedside to be able to see a bit more clearly. “Yes, however, I apologize for the concern it may have caused you to have me suddenly lose consciousness.”  
Patton’s eyebrows furrowed. “Logan, you don’t need to apologize!” He glanced at Roman who snuffled slightly in his sleep at Patton’s normal speaking voice. He quickly lowered his voice before continuing. “Logan, we were worried because we care about you. What happened?”

Logan hesitated, hand twitching for a moment to move towards the pain in his chest. He sighed before deciding that Patton would likely see through any attempt to brush off the concern.

“I…underestimated the severity of some chest pains I’d been experiencing.” Logan shook his head. “They had only been occurring for a few minutes before I went unconscious but,” Logan hesitated before sighing in defeat. “The pains seemed to occur whenever I either thought of or interacted with Roman.”

Patton’s face seemed to go through a mix of emotions that Logan was unable to discern, his experience with understanding emotions very limited. Eventually, Patton seemed to settle on a more neutral expression and carefully said, “Is it a bad feeling towards Roman?”

Logan emphatically shook his head. “No! No, it’s not-“ Logan sighed in frustration. “It’s not a bad feeling _towards_ Roman, but the pain only seems to occur when he is present either in person or in my thoughts.”

Patton’s face relaxed a bit but he was obviously still concerned. He seemed lost in thought for a bit, Logan letting him mull his situation over as he had no better ideas.

Patton seemed to have something dawn on him as his face lit up and he looked back up at Logan. “Besides the pain, can you tell me how you were _feeling_ when you either interacted or thought about him.”

Logan snorted softly. “Feel. I don’t-“ he cut himself off as a sudden realization came over him.

Describing Roman’s eyes as sparkling. The warmth at Roman’s smile he’d felt before the pain. Those were the moments when the pain had hit him.

Logan looked at Patton, the shock at his realization clear in his face. “Good. I mean, I was having _good_ thoughts about Roman when the pain hit.”

Patton patted Logan’s hand softly. “Logan, buddy, I think you might be in love.”

Love. Ridiculous. Logan didn’t feel anything, yet alone love. And, besides, since when had love been a pain in someone’s chest. It didn’t make _sense_.

Logan shook his head. “No. Impossible, it-I mean, since when has love been signified by _pain_.”

Patton’s smile almost seemed pitying and Logan hated it. “I’ve been doing some research on repression after the past video and I’ve learned that sometimes when feelings get pushed down too much, it can end up physical hurting you. You’re feelings will start to make you _feel_ , even if it’s physically. I think you’ve tried for so long to not feel anything you’ve been pushing your feelings for Roman away.”

“I-“ Logan squeezed his eyes shut, the pain in his chest reacting to the truth in Patton’s words. “How do I make it stop? The pain?”

Patton squeezed his hand gently and said, “You have to feel the feelings you’ve been pushing down. You have to stop repressing them, or the pain will just build.”

Logan’s eyes jerked open as he suddenly felt Roman move. His head rose from the bed and he gave Logan and Patton a _very_ sheepish look.

“I, um, may have been awake for a bit but didn’t want to interrupt you?”

Logan wanted to be angry but the warmth from Roman holding his hand was battling the pain in his chest. Patton gave Logan’s hand one more pat before standing up. “I think I’ll leave you two to talk for a bit.”

The silence between the two was heavy as the door shut behind Patton.

Logan was the first to speak.

“How much did you hear?”

Roman had the decency to look ashamed. “Ummm, when Patton said you shouldn’t apologize for passing out?”

Logan sighed but gripped Roman’s hand a little tighter. “Then I suppose there’s no point beating around the bush.”

Logan looked Roman squarely in the eyes. “Roman, I believe I may be in love with you. It seems that my repression of said feelings have been causing me harm. I am telling you this both because you have already heard it in my discussion with Patton and because I feel it is best that we are open with each other, for Thomas’s well-being if nothing else. I would now like to hear your thoughts on the situation.”

Roman, eyes wide, seemed to be taking a moment to take in Logan’s short monologue before bursting into gleeful laughter and pulling a very confused Logan into a tight hug.

“Logan, of course I love you! I’ve loved you for the past two years, Specs, this is the happiest day of my life!”

It took a moment before his words hit him. Logan blinked. Slowly, his arms returned Roman’s embrace and he hugged him back. He gripped him so tightly he might’ve been worried of hurting Roman if he’d had any thoughts left in his head but warm. Roman was so warm and he loved him and Logan loved him and he was hugging him and-

The pain in his chest was still there. It sat, a stone in his chest. However, instead of obsidian, it seemed a bit more like sandstone. The warmth of Roman’s arms around him and the words he’d said were wearing away at it. Perhaps the pain wouldn’t disappear immediately, but he could already feel the stone getting smaller. And when Roman pulled back, his whole face glowing with joy and all of it was aimed at him, all thoughts of the pain was gone and just the desire to kiss him. Logan decided it was about time he decided listening to his feelings and pulled Roman in, capturing his lips in a kiss and as Roman smiled into the kiss the pain shrunk a little more.

Logan was letting himself feel and right now, in this moment with Roman, he felt happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a comment! Feel free to leave constructive criticism! Give me validation!


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